Saturday 13 January 2018

Self Help Books.

Good Afternoon folks!

I'm still settling into the new flat and have been moving a lot of furniture around this week (and spending a lot of money) All of my bedroom furniture now matches, and will look amazing as soon as I finish building everything. I still have wardrobe doors to put on. But I've moved my book cases around and rearranged- and even put a new one up! Whilst doing so, I've been thinking about the things that aid me in dealing with my mental health and day to day anxiety. Without a doubt, reading is one of those things. It's something I forget about sometimes. And it is something that I don't do enough. I've realised that I have purchased a lot of self help books over the years. I decided to compile my favourites and put them in a blog post. I'm considering doing a series of posts regarding tools for managing mental health.

So I'll start with Matt Haig's Reasons to Stay Alive. I've had this since it came out- it was the first book I bought after my parents separated and I started to slip back into depression. Reasons to Stay Alive was too much for me at that time. I was seventeen and encouraged me to face my feelings head on. And I wasn't ready. So for a while I left it on the shelf, untouched. I finished a while later and I wished I had done it sooner. Haig is a wonderfully talented writer, who is unafraid to discuss the intricacies of mental health. He imagines interactions between his previously depressed self and a present day self that has survived the depression. A self that can see a better future, and a break from the misery. Haig personifies the depression, and I adore it. It's what I do a lot of the time because the feelings then become easier to explain. Depression feels so strange. It feels like it's something that is uniquely yours. Something that makes you strange, and weird and different and so very alone. So when Matt Haig describes a demon that was 'real and false all at once', I can both see and feel it. I recognise this 'three foot [...] impish and grey' looking demon. Matt Haig talks about facing it head on, and getting better. But also accepting that it feels like it is always going to get worse before it feels better. Matt Haig made me feel normal again- and that is so so important to me.

Next? Let's go with 14000 Things To Be Happy About! This little book is so so sweet and I have a tendency to forget it is there. I should find comfort in this book more often. It is just a big long list of things to be happy about. The list includes items such as 'curling up in a ball', 'a timid tiger', 'dance marathons' and 'Santa's kitchen'. There are relatable things on these lists, just as there are some really crazy things on the list. But the crazy things are guaranteed to make you laugh. Even if you don't feel like it. The list will make you smile, and recall old memories that you'd forgotten. It makes you think, and appreciate the little things. That could never be a bad thing.

I'm going to talk about Dodie's Secrets For the Mad next. This is a book that I've only had for a couple of weeks, if that. And I haven't had chance to get properly acquainted with it as much as the others. Dodie addresses her book, first of all, to 'the people with minds that just don't stop; for those who feel everything a thousand times more than others around them'. The most recent occasion that I have fallen into depression, I would curl up and ground myself with books and the occasional youtube video. Watching Dodie's vlog documenting her depression meant I was able to confront my own feelings in a small way. It was a start and eventually my best friend convinced me to completely confront my feelings and depression. Dodie's book makes me feel as normal and as comforted as her youtube channel does. The book is divided into My Bad Brain, Obsessions, Confessions, Life Lessons and Encore. It's a really cool structure and Dodie covers so much more than just mental health problems. I like that she does this, it shows that there is so much more to life than the depression and anxiety. Dodie refers to her 'bad brain' and states that it 'demands to be dramatic'. This is something I can sympathise with. Dodie's book scares me less than perhaps Matt Haig's book does. Maybe it's the inserted song pages, and doodles that make it seem less terrifying. But I find comfort in them both, just in different ways. Sometimes I am in need of the confrontation of reality and my feelings that Haig provides. But sometimes I am also in need of the softer approach of Dodie Clarke.

Okay. Finally, I want to talk about Fearne Cotton's Happy Journal. The journal is a companion to Cotton's self help book. And I'll confess, it's one that I haven't read. On occasion, I find journals helpful with regard to my mental health. But I also find it hard to make a habit of. It's something I would really like to work to and commit to. Cotton's book is a lovely idea. The pages are colourful and full of useful promts to encourage positive thinking. And I understand that it's about being more suscinct, but I would have liked more space to write. However, I think Fearne Cotton's journal made me realise that I find more comfort within books like Haig's Reasons to Stay Alive, and Dodie's Secrets for the Mad. I prefer books, when I am at my most depressed, that do not require me to interact. Though I'll accept that sometimes interaction and self evaluation is a good process to go through. I am happy to have this journal in my possession.

Okay, so I'm really fond of self help books. Especially with regard to my mental health. And I completely recommend every single one of these books. I might follow this up with a list of fictional books that I've found helpful and enjoy!

Well I hope you're all having a wonderful Saturday afternoon and enjoy the rest of your weekend!

S x




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